In this blog I will write down my mental diseases
Take care when reading.
You are warned
I need to break in order to stay sane
I need to break in order to stay sane
I need to break what needs to come to a break
I need to break in order to stay same
I need to break in order to fly away
I need to go
Toughts of today
It is 4”00
I don’t know what is happening to me
If I am okay or not
I am very restless
I don’t feel like i have much patience
Or calmness to stay focused
I run away from myself
Allahu akbar
Waza’s bible
There’s a strange rule in islam
Haram
And halal
Left and right
They say haram will confuse u
If you choose allah
This might be the only option
Or is there a loophole
I don’t thinks so
Please for give me before I have sinned
If I continue
Meaning there is no in between
But what do you do when u are
That means u are in a waiting room
Waiting
Waiting creates friction.
Does this mean you become a loser
What is the possibility to move?
Probably ur heart will explode
Doing nothing nowadays is cheaper
Until you grind hard enough
I have never smoked this many sigarettes in my life
I have spend too many days alone
2 days
With Maria
Nothingness
Pretty awesome
Doing nothing
Sipping wine
Eating olives
Smoking marlboro gold
Al hamdulilah for what allah has given to
Uss
In the morning I was screaming from the inside
Allah I hate u
It was pretty relieving
Because I wasn’t blaming myself
After I think about it now its maybe all we ever needed
Not to blame anyone but ourselves which is indeed
In the hands of allah
If that makes sense
It doesn’t make sense
What to do next
Just keep on going
Accept your mistakes
But don’t forget them
Time will make u stronger
I had a motor accident
Because I don’t want to accept I am gay
One deal
I am not going to drink any alcohol anymore or go out drinking in my life
Ever
I need to do it differently
I am supposed to be surrounded
But I don’t allow many people in my space
How come
Cuz when u don’t accept yourself it is hard to allow people in the self
The next time I am gonna say no
I can look in the future
Not far enough
And not my future
But I tend to see other people’s futures
Without me
I think that’s better
But maybe not the
Best for them
I am sorry i can’t help you.
Whilest you actually can
But where do boundaries lay?
Actually freedom is in giving boundaries
I learned today
Appointment is an appointment
But I am missing out on them
And I am not being on time
I should better plan before hand
Paragraph 2
I have big stories to tell
I have tears in my eyes
My mouth is dryy
I can not denyy
In the I ended up running after a crackhead that stole my brothers Dolce & Gabanna vest
Who was the crackhead actually.
Maybe I
Was one too
He stole
My vest
I stole his time
What
Makes people believe you can take something of someone else
Time
Energy
Without proper return
Its devaluation
Major crack energy
Still I kept on running after him I saw him from far away he was on the bike. It felt like if I wouldn’t catch him I would lose my dignity. How can a man be so hard on him self yet make the same mistakes over and over. Don’t let your stuff alone . Don’t tempt people to steal from you.
Yet bad decision create good stories
So here I am still
Running around dehydrated
Alone
With goals
That feel like I can catch them. But only if I am able to let them happen to me.
Yet I am still running after a crackhead
Or was I the crackhead?
But just with too many ideas.
Paragraph 3
So
So i finished that
Whats next
Leave
When ur broke means u just depressed
Meaning u spend more than what you earn always be happy make sure
You have money
Or don’t give a fuck
Why
Never say fuck you
That’s disrespect
Money is like trash
Paragraph 4
What happened
I was driving
I pass by 2 people walking on the middle of the road I try to avoid them but he suddenly went to the left. Because of the way they walked he looked drunk. When I was avoiding them
I hit a scooter parked because I had to go to the left. I fell. I got up and everyone came to me I was looking at the scooter and wanted to fix it with the gardien. The man came aggresive to mee and grabbed me i gave 100 dh for the scooter. The man stayed aggresive and kept grabbing me i got scared and i wanted to leave because he grabbed me by my neck. He took my keys out of my scooter. And i tried to take them back.
Shall i tell u the story again?
Seize the day
Split the day in two
Split the world in two
Make it one
In one
Seize the day
Emotional laziness
In the end wazaytan is not about being the sheytan. I would never do my name dirty. Sheytan is a devil. Don’t get it twisted. You are sheytan. I am sheytan. Your food is sheytan. The things u try to posses is sheytan. I am possesed. You are possesed. The media is possesed. Drugs posses you. The devil frees you. And every sinner has a future.
Again don’t get it twisted.
Anger is not insanity
Don’t come at me all evil and stuff.
Saying my vibes are not right.
Bitch
Shut the fuck off.
Talk or help or get the fuck out of my life.
Can i have two girlfriends?
Inshallah
I am a magical person
This might just be a love blog
For the ones that don’t know me yet
I have been going throught it
I will stop saying that
This is the last time
Indeed love and heartbreak is the last thing i want to work on
But i will always keep on working
Never working
Is the same
I don’t like to talk about me
Let’s talk about you.
Its gemini season baby
Come throught
Its evil in the night
And i don’t make mistakes
I say to her
Your my goddess in the skies
I don’t get that we kill flies
Because the angels over me they will never break me
My heart always stays the same
With every scar that has been put on it.
Every interaction i have to be grateful for
How can i love so many people
I don’t know how my heart is that big
But maybe they just exist in my fairy tale
A fairy tale of strong lady bugs
And a small reminder to myself
I don’t need to have fomo
I enjoy for you
Update
A broken site for a broken cross-continent collab.
Thank you to everyone that helped with their testing, insights and tips.
Thank you to @a_t_o_m__a_t_o_m__a_t_o_m for documenting the whole shop catalogue
Thank you to all collaborators that have been involved during the past years. We all started this together. Without you I wouldn’t be here. I see you lets keep on building and working together you are so beautiful.
“Feeling kinda scared but I am going to do it”
Shop. Archives. Blog. About. Radio.
Live now.
Stay sane. Waza is on the way.
See it as a way to pave your identity through my brains. I will go through the dirt for you. So your aesthetics stays insane.
The main goal. Is to create. Everyday, a dream coming true. A step closer. To the goal. Where my work can finally be found. For you, for me.
Welcome to my world; you are on earth right now.
All options and garments are 1 of 1’s with as goal to create an continues collection of garments, memories, experiences for the body, and mind, to become as close to ourselves as we can. To become the most powerful version. It is not easy sometimes with all the distractions, opinions. Who gives a fuck either way. Money is like trash. But I believe in pure being, happiness, no fear, and garments that become one with someone. I am happy to finally make my clothes available for you. By purchasing an item u will support the continuation of waza. Development of new materials and a ready to wear clothing line.
Also in my archive you can see many of my performances so reach out to me for collaborations and bookings. I want to do more.
With pleasure Balazs and Waza